Two Triple Critters (Side Order of Fries)

Horseshoe Crabs, Unicorns, Arctic Survival, and a Book Giveaway

Today’s goofy title is a homage to the above low-budget music video by Commander Cody and His Lost Planet Airmen, for his novelty song “Two Triple Cheese Side Order of Fries.” Released in 1980, the Emmy-winning video (really) was an MTV staple, and makes me nostalgic for when you could achieve minor fame without guile or polish.

One of my fondest childhood memories involves the first time I discovered horseshoe crabs on the beaches of the New Jersey shore. They are helmet shaped, and their shells were used as such; they have a tail like a spike, a dozen flailing legs. They are possibly the most dangerous-looking yet harmless members of the animal kingdom, and the more you learn about them, the more fascinating they become. They aren’t crabs, they have ten legs—twelve if you count their front claws—and blue blood; their eggs feed migrating birds such as the red knot; and their blood is used to test vaccines in the United States (the EU has moved on to a non-animal substitute.) They are oddly shaped with that big shell, and can turn turtle in the surf; scientists have given us the okay to flip them right-side up and help them out! And they need our help. There are now limits on harvest, but only a few years ago they were being used for eel bait and nearly depleted. Now they are used for vaccine testing, and while the labs are supposed to harvest the blood safely and release them alive, there is little oversight.

My buddy Brian Donohue of News12’s Positively NJ told us all about it:

They need our protection, like so many other species. When we found the shells of dead horseshoe crabs we would use the spikes for swords or… unicorn horns. How’s that for a segue?

One of my favorite animated films is The Last Unicorn, based on Peter S. Beagle’s groundbreaking and innovative fantasy novel of the same name. The Animation Obsessive did a deep dive on the making of the film, how it remains unique as a Japanese and American collaboration, and how it rose from flop to classic:

The Making of 'The Last Unicorn'

I recently read the story of Ernest Shackleton, and it remains a stunning story of survival in the Antarctic sea, one of the most inhospitable regions on Earth (at least for humans! birds and sea life do fine.) Endurance by Alfred Lansing is a grueling read as the crew faces obstacle after obstacle. It’s also why when Sarah and I saw a commercial for a Viking cruise to Antarctica, we cackled to ourselves and thought it ill-advised, especially given the fate of the Titan submersible. Shack and his crew had great stores of supplies. If they had recruited indigenous people from the other pole, they might have had a better time. That didn’t help the Wrangel expedition…

I learned about Ada Blackjack from Diaries of Note. She was an Iñupiaq woman who signed on for an expedition to Wrangel Island in the Arctic. After all but one of her thankless shipmates perished, she tended to the last jerk until he died, then survived for 2 years alone with the ship’s cat, fending off bears and surviving in a hut until she was rescued. The man who funded the expedition ripped her off and profited from her story, and she died in 1983 without her side being told. As you might guess, she kept a diary, and Ada Blackjack: A True Story of Survival in the Arctic tells her story. And this short film uses diary entries, told in her native language, to share her tale:

Here’s a more uplifting story of indigenous wisdom and gumption: Alessandra Korap Munduruku stood up to mining companies destroying the Amazon rainforest, and she and her people are winning.
I’m currently reading Better Living Through Birding by Christian Cooper, and The Word for World is Forest by Ursula K. Le Guin; my other reads are available on the Pluckery Page in the bottom right, as well as the books I’ve written. Cooper also has a National Geographic channel show called Extraordinary Birder, which is good fun. He brings real joy to it. Cooper created two LGTBQ+ characters for Marvel and Star Trek in the ‘90s, long before he became internet-famous for the Central Park Birdwatching Incident, and I’m glad he’s bringing birding to millions of people now.

My most recent read was Becoming Wild by Carl Safina, which focuses on three species in particular to explore how animals have culture, and how it may lead to new species. It begins with the matriarchal pods of sperm whales, then onto scarlet macaws, and finally two tribes of chimpanzees. I thought I knew much about chimps and whales, and I learned even more. And the macaws are brilliant and fascinating. It’s a great read.

To Add Value™ to the subscription tiers, and to reduce my book hoard, paid subscribers can respond to this email if they want my copy of Becoming Wild: How Animal Cultures Raise Families, Create Beauty, and Achieve Peace. First one gets it.